


The Littlest Robin

by Hero_addicted



Series: Littlest Robin [1]
Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Dick Grayson is Nightwing, Gen, Jason Todd is Robin, Jason is a Dork, Jealous Jason, Street Kid Jason, before he died, bruce is not dark and angry, little!Jason, starved street rat
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-08
Updated: 2016-06-22
Packaged: 2018-07-13 20:40:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7136279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hero_addicted/pseuds/Hero_addicted
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ever wondered what life was like for Jason todd before he died? Was he really the worst robin? Was he really a brash idiot that deserved to be made into a warning to other robins?</p><p>What if he was just a kid that got fucked over too many times?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Heart on Your Sleeve is Gonna Get you Hurt Here

Jason knew he was a scrawny kid but he was never the type to stand by while someone was in trouble even if he’d be the one who gets hurt at least the victim could get away. Though too often than not he has to come home with split lip and black eye because he decided to stand up for someone. It’s not like he could expect to find help with his injuries at home. He could probably only expect more bruises from dad as he takes his beatings for mom who’s drugged up to her eyes...again. 

Life wasn’t always so hopeless for Jason. He remembered a time he was able to go to school and his mother was still lucid enough to go to work at that Italian restaurant. Sometimes she was allowed to bring some the food from work back home. He loved the bread sticks and pasta. Having that now is a luxury. Food is scarce since nobody has an actual job anymore. His dad is just digging them into debt with his gambling and other dirty dealings with the other scum of the streets. And as for his mother, well she needs her medicine. If he didn’t do something soon about their situation they’d all be dead. 

That’s just what happened He swallowed his pride and looked for favors to do for measly spare change. Some people felt that just because he was a kid he didn’t need money, so they would give him enough to buy a candy bar. They just assumed his parents wouldn’t give him an allowance. They guessed he’s only looking for ways to get money to save for a dumb toy or something, Normal kid stuff. Some would give him a weird look, what was a tiny child doing knocking on stranger’s doors for? For those people he’d run before they get the chance to think a second thought.

He would save what he made for emergency. But in their household fueling addictions, and paying off the angry debt collector for a few more days is an emergency. Far too often his hard earned savings amounted to zero. Sure maybe he could have used it to get a new jacket, but no nothing. Sure it frustrated him to no end. He had even tried to hide it in his clothing though as soon as he took them off the money was gone. Besides walking with coins in your sneakers hurt and made a quick getaway difficult. 

The reason he didn’t just run away from crime alley and never looked back was because of his mother. He loved her since she was the only person in the world that cared about the tiny runt Jason Todd. He remembered when she used take him out to the park. He would ask to play ball with the other kids and they would joke about his size a bit before he’d prove himself by weaving in, out, over, between, and behind them making the goal of whatever game they decided to play that day. 

He was quick on his feet and sometimes surprisingly strong to the other boys. He was a runt often making them underestimate him. He’d use that to his advantage. When they thought he’d be the easiest to take out he’d slip right by them before they knew what hit them. He loved the sight of their absolutely stunned expressions as he scores another point. When he was knocked down he’d spring to his feet again, playing harder than before. After a couple rounds they realize he’d be force to be reckoned with. 

They would always try new games to find something that they wouldn’t lose so horribly against him. When they picked teams they’d always try to pick him first. That was probably the closest he had to friends. Though nowadays the park is dangerous he hears there’s a crazy lady that uses plants that eat kids like him. Not that he’s scared he’s already got enough stuff going on and he had no desire to be devoured by a daisy any day. Anyway the other kids don’t really go to that park anyway, thanks to her.

He remembered when enjoying the trips to the museums with his mom. He remembers his mom especially liking the art museums. They could be boring sometimes, though he would be lying if he didn’t acknowledge there was something pleasant about the silence and lavishly decorated halls with grand tapestry illustrating the great Greek tragedies the hero sometimes triumphant against monsters. He had to admit he was impressed with Artisan crafted furniture including lion headed table legs to a vanity with a scene of the Garden of Eden shaped in gold the various furniture was strewn about to get a good look at it. He felt a bit like a prince strolling down the various art exhibits. There was no way he could ever have anything like this but he dares to dream. 

What he liked the most were the natural history museum because of the realistic model T-rex. He also liked the museum of aeronautics that had planes and helicopters hanging from the ceiling. His favorite was wonder woman’s invisible jet. He wasn’t sure if it was really there but if not then the people who worked at the museum seemed to really like wiping the air. The thought was funny to him. Imagine being asked to clean literally nothing with mop and rags to keep up the image of wonder woman’s jet being featured in the museum. He’s sure wonder woman wouldn’t give up such a cool aircraft to this place to collect dust, though on the other hand she can fly so maybe she could? 

Now when his mom stopped being able to come with him, he doesn’t really want to go anymore. He looks too unkempt and dirty, suspiciously like the type that would steal or break something there. Kids like him wouldn’t hang out in a museum for any other reasons than to cause trouble. That paired with no adult accompanying made the security guards distrustful of him at the very least. 

When the museum is packed with tourist he would get trampled. When the museum was empty it’s lonely. The security guards that weren’t wary of him felt concern. They would be constantly bugging him about where his parents were. He was a child after all and museum is really big and easy to get lost in. When he dismissed them they would always be following him. The ones lingering for longer acted as his escort around the museum either out of concern or to make sure he thought twice before starting trouble. One tried to start a conversation with him but gave up after a few mumbled responses, seeing that he really didn’t want to talk. 

He could understand the reason for the guard’s apprehension. The museum was a favorite place of cat woman, a skilled thief that stole anything of value from the museums. She mostly stole jewelry or something small from them, since anything big would slow down an escape. Her antics led to heighten security meaning he can’t go in anymore with being labeled a security risk. 

He didn’t like home There used to be just enough food in the cupboards to have a meager meal and they had a kitchen that was not completely barren. Maybe there was a time he got to play with a couple of other kids kicking around a ball instead of getting his head kicked in by other street kids. 

He only ever wishes be could run away and never look back, but his mom…he won’t, can’t leave her with his dad. His dad is the reason that everything is awful. Even if he didn’t have to worry about his mom didn’t have anywhere to go. Nobody cares about a dumb little street runt. 

As his life got more rotten. Before he dropped out he would start to hide away in the school library. None of the bad things could bother him there. The Librarian was nice; she never tried to kick him out. She would always talk about how kids aren’t too interested in reading for fun anymore and how most people who came to the library were the older kids who needed to do research and they rarely would pick up any of the fiction books and the young kids who came to the library would make too much noise and would either lose or returned the books in awful condition. 

At first she thought Jason was trouble. He looked like one of those kids that would always get into fight (which he did) and scream up a storm, but he would just come in and hide in the shelves without a sound. He would pull out a few books, look at the cover, and put them back in. He’s either indecisive or couldn’t read. At first he’d flick through the picture books and find his place in the furthest corner of the library. He would be hiding the books he picked out under his ratty worn jacket, like he didn’t want anybody to know what he picked out. His selections were harmless many picture books became simple beginner reading books moving on to more advanced reading material.

It brought a smile to her face when the boy came to her to ask what a certain word meant. When she gave him an answer the boy would try to sound it out. Weighing the syllables on his tongue before integrating it into his vocabulary. It made her proud to see the boy use the words in a sentence. 

Sometimes the boy would indulge in comics. It brought a smile to her face when she heard the boy silently gasp at something in the story or would try to stifle a giggle. Then his mother would come to pick him up always telling him he’s supposed to come home and how worried she was when he was late. 

The boy would hug her tight and hold her hand when she leads him back home always asking if he wants to take a book home he would shake his head no. “It’s fine mama I can come back and read the rest tomorrow” the librarian could see in his eyes that he really wanted to take the book home, he was probably just worries about losing it at home. He is a rambunctious little boy after all, even if he’d already proven to be very careful with the books. 

At some point he began to come everyday to the library and staying until it closed sometimes even needing to be asked to leave. She notices how his mother would come to pick him up less and less to the point that she’d stopped coming. She would feel bad and let him stay for a few extra hours to talk about the books he’s been reading. When she asked where his mother was the boy would just say that she’s busy with work. He would just put his head back in the book before she could ask more questions about it. She won’t push him if he doesn’t want to talk. 

She tells him that he can take the books out if he takes care of them. His eyes would glimmer ever so slightly at the thought, but he just puts them back in the correct shelves in the end. He’s sure if he takes them he won’t be able to return them since his home isn’t really the safest place to keep things. Besides he likes the library it felt like the closest thing to safe. She would joke that he’d make a good librarian someday he would sadly smile and thank her for letting him stay for a bit longer and leaves. 

He hates coming home. He hates that there’s never anything to eat. He hates that something in their already mostly barren apartment can always be missing. They would sell his mattress or their busted microwave to get a few bucks. He hates that his dad uses the money to get drunk and beats them up with his lowered inhibitions. He hates that he never apologizes for hurting him and his mom when he’s out of control. He hates that his mom feels so hopeless that she resorted to drugs to get her away from this crummy life they live. He hates that he doesn’t have money to get food for the third day in a row because it was stolen, it’s always fucking stolen. He wishes his rotten dad would disappear forever instead of constantly coming back and ragging them for money for his fucking debt.

He wishes to have his mom back. He wishes her eyes weren’t so cloudy with hopelessness and dangerous combinations of drugs. He wishes he could have her before she ever tried to hide her addiction from her son. Before her addiction reached the point that it was so obvious she was high when she couldn’t muster the energy to get herself out of bed, while heroine needle were shoddily hidden behind dressers, before she wasn’t even lucid enough to recognize his face as pill bottles rolled about out of her fingers. Before when she could actually try to stop because she cared. He wishes she still cared, because it didn’t feel much like she did anymore.

She used to try to protect him from his dad when he came in raging drunk cursing at world. Back then Jason would be hidden away his mom telling him to cover his ears and look away. Back then he would jump at every loud sound that was a strike to his mother as she cried out. Back then he’d nearly cry when he saw his mom sporting new bruises. 

“Momma why can’t we leave?” his voice quivered 

“I’m sorry Jason but we have nowhere else to go” she was going to cry he didn’t want to make his mother cry “I’m sorry Jason I’m so so sorry” she crouched to the ground and hugged her son. She couldn’t hold herself together in front of her son anymore. She used to pet his hair a soothing gesture only serving to break his heart a little bit more.

He promised himself he would be strong for his mom “Don’t worry momma I’ll-I’ll make s-sure we’ll b-be okay s-someday” his breath hitched trying his best not to cry. He was just a boy barely 8 years old yet. He’s so small he looked 5. He was willing to do anything turn this situation around. He will find a way to get money no matter what; his heart dreamed they’d live like kings someday.

The thought of that only made her more despondent. He shouldn’t ever have to do that. He shouldn’t have to miss school to make sure the loan sharks don’t kill the only person who ever cared about him. He shouldn’t have to pickpocket to eat. A seven year old boy shouldn’t be beaten up in an alley with cuts and bruises with no way to fix it because they’re too damn poor to afford any kind of medical supplies or treatment. 

His mom just tried to rinse the cuts under the tap “oh Jason what happened?”

“A lady was gonna get mugged or worse she coulda been ra-”

“Jason please,” her voice cracked “don’t you could have been seriously hurt or worse”

“sorry mama I won’t do it again” that was a lie he couldn’t stop himself from coming to the rescue he just couldn’t stand to see the innocent get hurt. Watching brutes intentionally hurt a woman or child made his blood boil. The fact his father is one of those brutes only made him angrier. 

“Jason I’m sorry please you’re a kind sweet boy I just god I don’t know what I would do if something happened to you” she sobbed “don’t ever change just be careful”

“Okay mamma” he whispered hoarsely as he rubbed circles into her back doing his best to calm her down. He swallowed down his emotions he needed to be strong.

“Always wearing your heart on your sleeve,” she mumbled to herself but he could hear it clearly “I’m sorry you get hurt like this you deserve better I’m sorry” She felt guilty for leaving her son to deal with their misfortune and getting high instead of trying harder for him. She felt awful that she couldn’t even protect him from his own father anymore. 

It was a shitty irreversible cycle. She was depressed she took medication. The medication cost money, when they were already scraping by. Life only seemed to get worse so she got more depressed so she took more medication. The medication stopped working so she moved on to new meds the new meds were more expensive they barely had the money but she needed it when the debts stacked when dad starts drinking he gets angry she got more beatings. The days get bleaker more meds and those lose their effect but no longer having them only brings more misery. So she keeps taking them. The tolerance gets so high that stronger ‘medications’ are needed to combat the pain of the first medication caused. She couldn’t quit stopping was too painful to the point that she needed absolute numbness to stop all pain, but the numbness only last for a short while

That eight-nearly-nine-year-old boy shouldn’t have to come home to his mother choking on her own vomit, as her skin grows cold and her long been lifeless eyes stare blankly at the wall behind him. He shouldn’t have to bury his mother with a tiny grave marker because they didn’t have the money for a proper headstone. He shouldn’t he crying all alone in a cemetery throughout the middle of the night because he had nowhere else to go.

When his mom was gone there was no point in sticking around for his dad’s ‘debt collectors’ to come kill him. No thanks he’s way better off on his own on the streets. Well he’s kind of been living off it for a while before his mom died but now he’s out of empty apartment for good.


	2. Getting Better

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jason goes to wayne library. He also helps out Leslie Tompkins. He gets to be a hero in his own way. Just read ugh...

Life really isn’t that great without a roof over his head, in fact he was still starving.

He used to have to care of himself. He would guilt some people passing by to give him money. He really didn’t want to hurt anybody and begging really utilized his smallness to his advantage. They simply couldn’t say no to the dirty little runt that had missed a few too many meals. Sure it ate away at his dignity but he needed to eat more than small bits of chicken and rice and there was no way he could fight the other kid gangs for his right to some stranger’s spoiled scraps or a cleaned out soup pot. Even when he’s faster and sometime stronger than most of the ones he encounters, he’s still at a huge disadvantage when he’s out numbered and they’re big enough to lift him off the ground. When they do that there’s nothing much to do than wait for them to throw him into a brick wall, toss him in trash can, or dropping his face into the dark and dirty asphalt. But time and time again he’ll always get up and brush off the grime of his clothes. 

He can’t lie down and die after how much he fighting he’d already done to survive day to day. He’s Jason fucking Todd and he’s never going ‘home’ because he got no home. He pulls himself together and makes his way to a metro. It’s for the best that he spends as little time as possible in crime alley at night and the metro is slightly less dangerous than the streets. 

The metro is where the kids hang out tagging the subway train and random walls with rude messages. At night the adults roam the streets conducting business. The adults could kidnap him into their trafficking ring, that’s what most of the kid fear being taken and made into sex slaves or being sold for parts. It’s not beyond the Mafia not to beat up or kill children who stumble upon too much information about them. At night turning into the wrong alley can get you killed.

The metro isn’t that great either when the kids could beat him up too. But he knows that a punch from an angry scraggly teenager is probably nothing compared to a punch from a meathead wall of muscle that the mafia has on the surface. Most of the time they’d come at him unprovoked or blaming it him for being in their territory. As if they had an actual claim over this awful place. This street as a whole has to be owed by at least 3 kinds of criminal gangs one the money extorting mafia, two human traffickers, and three drug dealers. The rest operate on their own assaulting the unfortunate shmuck that has misfortune of wandering to these darker more disgusting spots of the already corrupt city of Gotham. The metro was a slightly better alternative to facing the scourge above.

He would sometimes travel the metro to a cleaner and nicer part Gotham when he could save up some money and not get mugged on the way. He would spend the whole day looking into shops, watching street performers, visiting the big library, and visiting nice librarian at his old school. 

He’s sure the librarian has caught on to the fact that he was living on his own. Heck he was practically breaking into the school since he didn’t go there anymore. She never kicked him out she would just hand him a new book to try out and settle by the checkout. They didn’t talk much as they used to. She could tell that the weeks or months that he’s been gone were a day-to-day battle but didn’t push for answers. He thanks her for not making him talk about them. 

 

When he had the chance he would visit the real library in the slightly nicer part of Gotham. It was a little bit out of crime alley. The building had massive column with giant fancy windows it was like the white house. It’s funded by Wayne enterprise as a part of a “make a better Gotham” program they had going on started by Martha and Tomas Wayne with their son continuing their dream. He saw that the kids in the poorer ghettos should get the opportunity to read or learn new things. Though standing in front of the building he felt he didn’t belong there. It was completely juxtaposed with the tiny street rat at its steps and the rest of the ghetto. Though he was never the type give up and a giant archive of books is the least difficulties he’s faced down and survived through. 

He waltzed in with his chest puffed out he was nervous though he wasn’t really sure why. They couldn’t kick him out if they wanted to. This place was built for poor kids like him. It’s supposed to be a safe haven of sort right? His chest deflated when he reached the door. It was so ornate they could get angry if he messed it up with his dirty hands. He thought about not going because he could make a mess inside with his ragged clothes and scruffy boots.

This is so dumb he’s acting like going into a building like meeting a girl or something. He had to be standing there for ten minutes fighting himself on whether he should enter or not. But then a girl with long beautiful ash blonde flowing hair pushed the door open. 

She was a tired teenager holding a bunch of bags with books, papers, and binders nearly falling out of her hands. She was incredibly tall and tripped over him. She couldn’t see him while she tried to keep her work from slipping out of her fingers but she ended up dropping everything and having it all scattered on the floor. Before it all fell to the ground Jason caught a couple textbooks and picked up her paper before it would be blown away in the wind. She looked so exhausted and near crying. 

“I’m so sorry lady I didn’t mean to get in your way” he handed all her papers back to her. She gave him a long dazed look at him. She probably fell asleep for a second and happened to be looking in his direction. 

“sorry kid I didn’t mean to trip over ya I’m late and” She startled awake and was rambling. She looked back at her watch and remembered what she was doing. When he was picking up the last of her papers and handed them to her she thanked him and leaped over his head before he got up. Well if they let crazies like her in then they surely could let in the likes of him. He pulled the door slightly and poked his head in. 

He gasped at the sight of it. There aren’t much people inside but there’s a multitude of books. His heart leaped into his throat. The school library was nothing like this, for god sake this place has a second floor!

He opened the door slightly and slid himself through the door. He froze when he made eye contact with one of the librarians. 

First time coming into the library they could immediately tell he was from crime alley. Everything about him screamed ruffian but they made no move to get rid of him. Some of them would just spare him a tired look that says ‘please don’t steal anything’. It was a pretty standard library even complete with old lady librarians. The only difference from other library was they didn’t bother having computers because those would obviously get stolen.

When he finally got used to the atmosphere he would hang in library constantly. He started off with sneaking and spending the night when it was too cold or when it was raining hard. He would rag a bean bag near a window for a quick escape or a reading light. He didn’t want to take advantage of the librarians’ tolerance when they let him stay in the first place. Though he occasionally thinks if he stayed there all the time nobody would notice. Nobody really notices Jason Todd. 

Though when the librarians noticed this little habit, or more specifically getting spooked by his unexpected arrival when they could have sworn they locked up. They would have thought he was a terrible little burglar if he wasn’t passed out surrounded by stacks of books around him and with one in his hands. They shake him gently awake and he would apologize and put all the books in their correct places a long with a few other books that were just left alone on tables. They watched him and looked out at the window. They guessed that he was just looking for shelter from the heavy rain so they let him go this time. Even if they didn’t like it that he could break in. 

Soon Jason noticed the librarians didn’t really pay him any mind when he slept there. Some of them even tried to strike up a conversation with him about the books he picked up. Turns out one of them used to be an English teacher and the girl that ran into him upon first arriving was her daughter and the girl’s name is Kathy. 

He stays in the library whenever he could. He would pick out whatever catches his interest. The books helped him get his mind off everything going on at the moment. He could let his body sink and be swallowed whole by the big beanbag chairs. He would laugh whenever one of the librarians, though mostly Kathy, would sit on the beanbag. He would sometimes hide underneath it and grab her ankle. She’d get so spooked. Though fun was over when she would try to put more of her weight on the beanbag and begin crushing him underneath. 

“Help! Kathy’s big butt is crushing me!” 

“My butt isn’t that big and besides be glad an even bigger butt didn’t sit on you”

“I don’t know your butt is pretty big” He wiggled his way out from under the beanbag. Kathy was pretty skinny but she’s really tall. She’s pretty, young, and still in college. She was asked him what his favorite color was. He replied red and the next day she came in with a bright red hair. She thanked him and said she loved it and kept the color to this day. The hair looked good with her green eyes. 

She went to the library not only for research but to sometimes help out her mom who was a real librarian though she could help anybody find anything they needed in a snap. She knew where everything was. Despite her mom’s love of books she wasn’t quite as much of a book nerd as he was but she’d happily read a bit of anything Jason recommended for her.

Often times she would just hand one of her textbooks to him and ask him to read it out loud. Whenever she was too lazy to read it herself. He didn’t mind though. He learned so much from doing that. Sometimes she worked on math homework and he’d sit nearby watching and waiting for her to finish so they can talk about stuff. One time she tried to teach him math so he could her homework for her. One thing he learned from that was that he wasn’t as good at holding numbers in his head as he was at holding random facts. Secondly Kathy was a good teacher but not quite patient, so she mostly ended up doing most of the work while showing Jason how to do it. Thirdly he’d not entirely sure why but Kathy’s mom is handing him money telling him he’s doing a good job.

The big library is much different from the one in the school he used to go to. It’s quieter for one. It didn’t have that many rowdy babies forced to come so their teachers can encourage reading or something. It didn’t have tired teenagers dropping heavy stacks of books for their essay research. He hates the book slamming. What he most appreciates is the silence. When it’s quiet there’s nobody coming after him to beat him up or try to kidnap him. If there was anybody who was going to be sneaking up on him to hurt him he could hear them coming, not that people like that go to libraries anyway. 

Some of them were suspicious of him more so than the school librarian at first. Which they had the right to be since he’s filthy and he has no parents with him. If a kid his age was coming to the library they would be there with their mom or dad. His mom is gone and he doesn’t want to even think about his dad. Bastard is probably in prison by now. 

He won over the librarians over time like he did with the one at school. They were charmed by his knowledge about classic literature and excitement for reading. But they were still worried about him. Some of them tried to bring up his parents asking him where they were. He would just ignore them when they asked and continue to read whatever was in his hands at the time. Some of them were insulted by his rude behavior and started to lecture him about respecting elders and whatnot but a few just gave him a look of pity and didn’t question further.

Though Kathy didn’t really care the closest reaction to bad he ever got out of her was when he ate her muffin one morning. She was studying and passed out some time at night. The muffin looked really delicious and he was hungry he hardly ever gets to eat much. He though Kathy wouldn’t mind, turns out she bought a muffin at some point in the night and was furious when it disappeared accusing some of the other librarians. When she realized he took it she groaned and made a sour face. She looked at him wordlessly for a while almost emotionless but he knew there was a bit of ‘frankly fucking insulted’ in there.

“What?” Her eyes widened. She was appalled that he couldn’t obviously see the crime he committed.

She stared at him for a couple more minutes of complete silence. The scrutiny made him uncomfortable. The she whispers “how could you” okay that hurt way more than any kind of screaming. It sounded disappointed if not slightly over dramatic. He wanted to offer to get her a new muffin but they both know he really didn’t have much money. She was always a bit soft on him. Besides she could probably buy a new one on the way to her college nearby. Though it was a really big blueberry with sugar on top and they might be out by the time she shuffles in all zombified from lack of sleep like every other student attending the college. 

“For your transgressions against my morning muffin” She point down to him in an over-the-top fashion. Jason swatted her hand away. He didn’t like it when she did that but she was probably a nit hysterical from all her homework. “I’ll stop reaching the books on the higher shelf for you” before he could argue she dumped her textbooks in her bag and shoveled all her pens, highlighters, and pencils into a pocket and rushed off to school. 

 

Sometimes he wishes he could live in the library. Not only the people seem to become a family of sorts for him, the inside was always a good temperature there was a bunch of reading corners with a bunch of pillows. Sometimes the librarians catch him falling asleep in there. But they never really bother him. At some point they would toss a blanket on him. He would wake up and wrap himself tighter in the blanket whenever he stayed for too long and the library was already closed and the light were off. Everything would be pitch black except for the yellow streetlamp lights pouring in from a few windows. He felt safe because all the entrance into the library is locked and nobody breaks into a library except him. 

He would walk with the blanket towards the window and read until the morning. He more or less found a home. He had a big sister of sorts in Kathy and the older librarians were like a mother to him. They began bringing him containers of their leftovers when they noticed he seemed a little malnourished. He happily accepted even if it wasn’t much. 

Though that didn’t stop him from trying to get money of his own. He couldn’t live off the Librarian’s kindness more than he already has. He would sleep during the day in the reading corner and leave at night. 

Winter would be settling in soon and when he had a bit of money to take the metro he’d stroll through the expensive clothes store district. The jacket he has now is a dirty blue puffy vest he had for years. He never grew out of it since he doesn’t really grow. The jacket wasn’t very warm, he thinks some of the insulating fluff has been flattened, and could only really serve as the most useless windbreaker ever since the zipper was broken. He knew there would be no way in a thousand years he could beg for enough money to get the warm jackets he saw passing the store displays. 

He couldn’t really sift through someone’s trash for a jacket either since people don’t toss jackets in the trash. Normally they would pass it to another family member. It was only when the jacket is in too awful condition with enough holes to make it useless that people would throw them away. If there was a trash can with said jacket it would already be picketed up by a hobo that was willing to fight to the death for it. 

If he was going to live though the winter with nowhere to take refuge he was going to need warmer clothes. The problem was that they were too expensive. He knew how to steal anything from the few times his dad was sober and not a “complete’’ piece of shit and decided to teach him his ways. The ‘father and son’ time they would share was lessons on how to shoot a gun, steal car parts, slash tires, lie, threaten, and other things that a good dad wouldn’t teach his son. His dad pretty much taught him the ways to be a criminal like him. 

He hated whenever he had to use the things he learned. At first he was a horrible liar. The words would get stuck in his throat and he’d be scratching and fiddling for a decent lie. He would be constantly fidgeting that anybody looking at him would think there was something wrong with him. He looked the part nowadays with dirty and slightly blood stained shirt and pants. 

The bloodstains on his clothes come from the tussles he’s forced into. Sometimes getting beaten up so bad that he’d wake up hours later dizzy. He couldn’t do much to do about it other then head to Ms. Tompkins. She’s a nice lady who picked him up after two guys who were harassing some poor lady beat him up, the poor lady being Ms. Tompkins.

He threw a piece of trash at them and bolted. He was quick. He knew the alleyways well enough to know which was a dead end, but the guys were a lot faster than he thought or at least their strides were big enough to catch up to him quick. They were pretty young and they were able to run for a lot longer than other scumbags like them. He was happy he was able to distract them from her when they were chasing after him. 

But it didn’t take too long before they cornered him he tried to dive between them but one of them caught him by the arm and punched him across the face. One held him down as the other threw a flurry of punches to his head. When he escaped their grasp he tried to kick them. He was disorientated and missed. The guys shoved him to the ground and kicked him when he was down. Then he remembered he had a knife on him he rolled over, he thinks he might have broken a rib, he grasps the knife tightly.

There is an ecstasy that marks the summit of life, and beyond which life cannot rise. And such is the paradox of living, this ecstasy comes when one is most alive, and it comes as a complete forgetfulness that one is alive. Knife in hand he stabs one of the guys in the thigh. The guy howls in pain and the other steps back for a second. 

He tries to make it back on his feet. He stumbled but he gave the two guys a cocky smile he was shaking in his boots. He told himself it was shock not out of fear. Actually he felt the furthest thing from fear in times like these his dumb “heroic” feats made him feel like he was worth something. He felt a little hopeful, like if he could die helping someone then that was better than dying from getting sick or getting kidnaped or being caught in a the crossfire of some gang war. 

“Who the hell beats a guy when they’re down, especially beating on a kid” He laughed at them he was swaying on his feet, his head was spinning, he could taste the metallic tang of blood on his lips, and his ribs are throbbing, but he felt like a million bucks. The guy he stabbed was growling at him and the other guy kept his distance. They circled him like a pack of wolves now they knew a better than to come straight at him now that they could see has a knife. However were far from afraid of a pipsqueak like him.

He was a killer, a thing that preyed, living on the things that lived, unaided, alone, by virtue of his own strength and prowess, surviving triumphantly in a hostile environment where only the strong survive. He held his ground and took a stance. He held the knife in front of him ready to stab either of them if they got too close

 

“didn’t yo mama eva tell ya not to stick yo nose where it don’t belong” The guy he didn’t stab wasn’t as afraid of him as he thought when he ran forward and snatched it out of his hand. He was shocked that he ran at him like that. They guy tried to get another punch at him but he dove out of the way before he could and did a clumsy pounce for the knife he threw aside. 

The guy with the stabbed thigh grabbed him and held him a couple feet off the ground. He was a lot bigger than him, though to be fair a lot of people were a lot bigger than him. Luckily before he grabbed him he got the knife back. He slashed at the guy’s arm causing him to drop him. 

However wasn’t quite ready to hit the ground and his legs nearly gave out from under him. Luckily he regained his footing and he took up his stance again. This time he would be ready if that guy rushes him again. Those guys were absolutely pissed now and he wasn’t sure if he could run away from them again with the pain in his ribs and the slight hurting in his knees from his drop. The guy he stabbed made a grab for him again making sure to avoid his knife. He still fought like an animal his knife was his tooth. He ducked his arm and made another cut and jumped on the other guy. He climbed his ugly sports jacket. The guy shoved him against a brick wall before he stopped at the slight of the knife to his throat. 

Being thrown around made it really difficult not to accidently actually slitting his throat. The thought of actually killing someone scared him even while he was an adrenaline high. When the guy stopped moving he internally gave a sigh of relief. However on the outside his face was hardened and trying to be the most threatening he could while still having round babyish cheeks. The sight would have been funny if it wasn’t also really sad.

He really couldn’t threaten anyone while he could reach up to most people’s chest. The best he could normally mange was hack at someone’s thigh, which he supposes brings them to his level so he could hold the knife to their throat. He already stabbed the first guy in the thigh and the knife to the other. Part one of being threatening achieved. Yay. 

He guess he could start making demands he’s gotten better at holding a straight face when lying and not stuttering or mumbling as he speaks. He thinks for a second whether he should do that deep voice like the Batman. Probably not it would probably seem dumb on him 

“YOU GUYS ARE GOING TO LEAVE ME ALONE AND ANYOTHER LADY THAT COMES AROUND HERE OR I’LL CUT YOUR THROAT OPEN” that went pretty well as his lying goes. Though it wasn’t quite good enough since they could see right through his bluff. The cut up guy scoffed. They could see it in his eyes he wasn’t a killer. Jason tried to push the knife a little closer to the guy’s throat but only the flat of it. “I SWEAR I’LL DO IT” no he won’t he really couldn’t he’s only eight years old. 

There they both stood in what was a sort of a Mexican stand off. His heart was beating in his throat. The biggest problem with threatening wasn’t only the fact that he wasn’t really scary enough to do it in the first place, or the moral dilemma of being like the bullies that stuff like that did it to him, Or even the thought or maybe having to follow through with his threats, but that most people didn’t fear death or maybe not death at the hands of a child. All the adults he tried it on all tried to talk him down or comfort him telling him he doesn’t need to do it and how he shouldn’t have blood on his hands. They were right he really didn’t want to kill them but needed them to be afraid enough to give him all their money. A few bucks couldn’t get him by.

Now he was going to threaten what looked like two Idiot College frat boys with a trade off for his life for the life of the piece of shit he held a knife to. 

When the guy recovered from the shock of being held knifepoint by a little kid. He pulled the knife away from his throat and threw him on the ground. He could feel the air being forced out of his lungs when his body meets the ground. When he hits his head on the rough asphalt the world goes black. 

 

He regains consciousness he’s met with a white ceiling and glaring lights above him. His ears are ringing and his head hurt. He quickly got up spots formed in his vision. Where was he? 

“Hello can you tell me your name?” A lady with graying hair spoke to him gently as if he was a spooked animal. Well he was a little freaked out he’s not sure where he was or who she was. Hold on the lady asked him a question.

“Name?” nice going Jay. God he can’t focus with the damn ringing. 

“What’s your name?” The lady shown a tiny flash light into his eyes he reached for the light to make stop. His attempts were futile. He groaned and the lady signed and put the light in his hands. 

He looked at the flashlight in his hands and blinked. He suddenly remembered the lady asked him a question he racked his brain to remember what she asked literally seconds ago. He didn’t want to look at the lady he felt dumb. He was a bit frustrated and played with the light and mumbled his answer “…Jason…where am I?” 

The lady answered “Oh it’s okay don’t worry you’re safe” He handed him a glass of water some pills a piece of chocolate. The medicine and water was welcomed but the candy was probably her treating him like a baby, but right now he’s tired and a little upset not at anything in particular just upset. “I’m Dr. Leslie Tompkins you’re in my clinic please relax you have a concussion” He looked at the lady suspiciously and then at the medication. 

He was just about to swallow the tablets. Until he realized “Sorry I can’t afford this” He tried to give the medication back to her as well as the chocolate. He wasn’t entirely in his right mind and he wanted the medication if it would help the pain. He whined a little “I don’t have any money”

“It’s okay you can have it no charge” poor kid looked at her like she promised to give him the moon. He just couldn’t believe someone would give him something like that without wanting something in return. 

But he felt a little bad for just taking them. He looked like he was about to cry. She quickly added “Besides you helped me out there it’s the least I could do” She combed her fingers through his greasy hair he hadn’t washed it days. “Shush” He swallowed the pills and drank the water. He slowly nibbled at the chocolate. “There’s more chocolate if you’d like” he gave out a tired mumble that she wasn’t sure was a yes or no. 

“Okay you can sleep” She was going to let him sleep but when she started to let go the boy held on to her sleeve. 

“M’nawt tired” He whimpered. To her it looked like he was struggling to keep his eyes open.   
She sat on the cot and pets the child’s hair some more he lean into her his face a little wet a kid his age would normally make a some noise but the most she got out of him was a little hitches and slight moan of “ow” his head was probably throbbing. He wanted her not to leave him all alone.

The kid was vulnerable now not much like how he was when he was taunting those men who were at least four times his size. He’s brave she’ll give him that. She was grateful to the kid for helping her but she couldn’t condone his actions. He could have gotten seriously hurt. He’s lucky that ribs only got bruised and weren’t broken or he wasn’t internally bleeding. 

She tried her best to make him relaxed enough to sleep. Even shifting his position she gently bounced him on her leg and rubbed circles into his back. 

“m’no baby” he mumbled in her shoulder his arms was loosely slung around her shoulders. 

“Do you want me to go?” he didn’t reply for a while she wondered if he finally fell asleep. She looked at his face and it was red as a tomato. He looked so cute. He was embarrassed. “It’s okay you’re safe here you can go to sleep”

He mumbled something into her shoulder again which sounded vaguely like “thank you” and he closed his eyes and drifted to sleep. He clung to her but it didn’t bother her too much. She stayed in the position for a while rubbing circles into his back. She could tell he was having a nightmare when he clung to her a little tighter. He’d say a few funny things in his sleep but for the most part he was quiet. 

She took the time to reflect what happened. She cornered by two men until the boy was throwing garbage at them screaming and shouting at them. Insulting their appearance doing anything to get their attention away from her. The men started to get annoyed and they went after him.

When she saw the boy run off with the two men chasing him. She went to look for him. She wished she could have caught up to the boy sooner and make sure he didn’t get hurt like this in the first place but he ducked between the shadows and she kept losing him at every turn. When she finally caught up to him he was on the ground unconscious. 

He had a split lip, black eye, bloody nose, bruised ribs and a concussion but nothing too serious. She picked up the child and she noticed he was too light. His face was round but he felt really skinny under his clothes. If she had to guess his age she would say he was five years old. She held him on her waist and let him rest his head on her shoulder from there she took him to her clinic to treat him. 

At her clinic she checked if he had any cuts or scrapes for her to clean he had a few. One was on the back of his head she rinsed it out with saline and left it. It wasn’t really bleeding much and it probably would be better if she washed his hair when he was awake. He had a few bruises on his arm, which she guesses is from when the guys probably tried to grab him. 

Most of the damage was to his face, which she put some bandages on what she could. She went to her medicine cabinet to pick out for the headache he would have when he wakes up. She poured a glass of water and picked out a candy that she gave to children. It normally made them feel a bit happier. 

She watched the boy waiting for him to wake up. She should probably order some food for him he looked a little malnourished. He looked like he was eating the bare minimum. That is hardly enough for a growing boy. It’s best to wait for him to wake up and see whether he could stay awake.

 

Jason woke up again his head still hurt but not nearly as badly as the day before. He remembers the nice lady holding him and giving medication and candy. He fished in his pocket and pulled out a flashlight he switched it on and curiously looked around dark corners in the clinic he was bored and he felt had the energy to do so heck he could probably walk out the door but he doesn’t really want to go back outside. He takes another glance at the flashlight before he realizes something is missing. He looks around the cot with the flashlight for it. 

“Nice lady do you have my thing?” he calls out of the room. Leslie thinks to herself what he could be talking about. He sounds worried so it must be important. 

“What thing? Also my name is Leslie Tompkins”

“Sorry miss Tompkins and I can’t tell you what it is” well that of defeats the purpose of asking her. But she’d probably be scared if she knew he was armed with a knife. Keyword being was. He hopped of the cot and searched the drawers in the office. He feels slightly compelled to steal the rolls of bandages for later use but it would be taking advantage of Ms. Tompkins’s kindness. 

He looks up at the medicine cabinet and wonders whether she could have hid it behind the pillboxes and bottles. He’s too short to reach up there. He grabbed for something he stand on to use as a boost the stool was too short and the wheelie office chair was the only thing around that could let him reach the higher shelf. It was very unstable and he could pretty easily fall off. 

He opened the sliding glass on the cabinet and pushed aside a few of the meds to find his knife. He had to find it he didn’t want to go through the stuff he had to get his hands on it in the first place. 

He always opted for the dangerous looking knife instead of a gun. It was easier to get his hands on a knife than a gun. The places that had guns lying around for the take were littered with dead bodies. It was unsettling to pull a corpse’s fingers away from a trigger of a pistol he wanted to take. 

If he was going to loot corpses he had to be there when they’re fresh but when the rival gang have left the building. If that gang wanted anything from them they get first pickings, normally they would take their drug stash and a few of their bigger weapons and leave the rest. When they left everything it was up for grabs. 

He hates going to those places but it’s a good way to get a bunch of wallets. Wallets have money and credit cards meaning he gets to splurge on cigarettes, food, and a new jacket. Though if someone finds him in the middle in looting he’s dead. But he has to if he’s going to have to if he’d going to get something to protect himself and get some money for a jacket to live for the cold winter. 

He’s got to go he’s not sure if he should tell Ms. Tompkins that he’d leaving. It’s the least he could do for her helping him. He had to be quick since he didn’t have much time. 

“Hey Ms. Tompkins I got to go now” He hears the clicking of heels on tile. Shoot she might not let him go. 

“You shouldn’t le-get down from there you have a concussion you can fall!” The shout startled him and the chair rolled away from under his feet. So he was awkwardly stretched out between the cabinet and the chair. The cabinet isn’t really stable and it wobbled a bit. It couldn’t support his weight even if there wasn’t much of it to support. He could only reach the chair by his toes if he loses the chair the whole cabinet can end up falling on top of him. 

Leslie rushed to his aide and picked if up away from what would have been a disaster of broken glass and scattered medication. He held him by her hip again though unlike last time he seems irritated or at least more displeased then last time. He had a cute little frown with his cheeks puffed out and his face red. He looked away a couple times avoiding looking at her. He’s ashamed of what he did which is more than she can say for the other kids that came to her clinic, either that or he was upset with being held like a baby again. 

“What were you doing on that cabinet?” He struggled to get out of her hold she put him down gently on the ground for him to stand looked her straight in the eyes. His eyes were like the stormy seas but it was quickly calmed when he remember who he was talking to. 

“I was looking for my knife...” He looked away again “I WASN’T GOING TO DO ANYTHING BAD TO YOU I SWEAR!” He really could have worded that better.

Leslie sighed. Well that a lot better than the alternative. She knows that street kids carry around weapons. If they’re going to be walking around Crime Alley they were going to need it. 

“What does your knife look like?”

“Well um…” He wasn’t expecting her to help him find his weapon “It’s a small kitchen knife black handle and shiny blade though I’m not sure how shiny it is after I stabbed that guy”

“You stabbed a guy?”

“He’s not dead I swear! I only stabbed his thigh and put a few cuts in his arm they were like paper cuts!” She rubbed her temple. She swears this kid if going to send her to an early death if he’s going to make her worry about him like this. 

“Well I can probably get you a new kitchen knife” she can’t believe she’s doing this “would a sharp pair of scissors work for now?” 

“uh yeah… it could work” He took the big scissors. “Um is it okay if I leave now?” 

“Well do you have any pain anywhere?”

“My head still hurts a little and my ribs are kind of sore but I think I’ll live” He smiled at her “Anyway I’m kind of busy I’ve got places to be you know” He laughed awkwardly. He felt a bit bad looking at Leslie’s face of concern. She went to a drawer to pick out some bandages and he handed them to him. She then went to the cabinet he nearly knocked over and picked out some medication. There was a moment of shock from him. 

“Take this medication once a day and two of these before you sleep these are for pain I also expect those scissor back if you ever end up here again” She smiled fondly at him “Though don’t think you’re not welcome here I’m happy to help you out from anything to a broken finger to a scraped knee”

“Gee thanks” he opened the door and made his way to the where he needed to go.

He quietly sneaks around the warehouse he heard rumor about. The rumors said that two rival small time mafia bosses are meeting up here. Bad blood’s been boiling between them for some time and they’ve had plans for double-crossing each other since the beginning. They’d only been avoiding each other’s way for the past week or so but rumor goes that the bosses have started to break the truce and started killing each other’s informers around Gotham or other rumors say a bad dealing. Whatever dumb thing mafias get into has them at each other’s throats. 

The only reason they’ve been civil for this long is because of the son and daughter from different sides have been dating. The fighting has come back on since one side has one of their own die at the hands of the other. He thinks it’s the exact same story as Romeo and Juliet.

He scurries away as he sees a car pull up and Penguin steps out with Anton Gordano the head of the mafia that Jason labeled as Capulet. He sees Anton’s smug face when he thinks he has the support of Penguin in this deal he going to work out with Mario Acardo, which he calls Montagu. He isn’t all that into street politics but it’s good to know a little bit so you know where to watch your step and more importantly where to loot. 

Penguin being here for the transaction really has him worried. There’s no way they’re going to put the Penguin in danger right? There’s no way the Penguin is going to let himself be caught in the middle of an obvious crossfire right? If Penguin is here does that mean Batman will follow? With Penguin here a lot more things can go wrong. He might even get anything tonight with Penguin there. He knows it’s an awful thing to think but if they don’t end up killing each other there won’t be anything to loot and he’s going to freeze or starve to death. 

Too many places think he’s too scruffy and pitiful looking to let him in except for the library. It’s been two week since he’s had an actual meal that wasn’t convenience store or meager scraps from the librarians. He’s been living on trail mix and PB&Js. The city is making way for winter and the weather is getting chillier. He feels like the only warm he gets is from a cigarette. The library is getting colder. The gang in the metro is now armed with a gun and promises to kill him if he comes to sleep there one more night. Jason’s survival rides on the two gangs killing each other. 

Park Row seems a lot worse at night when all the bad people come one to play. He’d have to move quickly or might end up needing more than Leslie’s help.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please remember to Kudos and comment, tell me what else you'd like to see.

**Author's Note:**

> Well sorry this was a doozy. I wonder if I should have split the Leslie part and Library part into two chapters. Nah. 
> 
> There'll probably be one or two more pre-robin Jason chapters to wrap things up and then we can get on to training. Not actually robining like maybe a few chapters of keeping him in the manor letting him get to know Alfred and Bruce. 
> 
> Suggestions would still be very much appreciated. Sorry about Kathy she's kind of OC and kind of Batwoman (not really). She's just there to lighten things up a bit.


End file.
